Gloriously and happily, about three months of verbal and written absurdity comes to an end.

But we’ll go from one level of blind irrelevance to another. More on that sadness below.

Atlanta goes 15th in the NFL Draft.

By Michael A. Lough

The Sports Report

centralgasports@gmail.com

That’s fine. Means the Falcons are closer to winning than outright sucking. Or Brownsing. Or doing the Carolina cha-cha. Or becoming the Gaguars.

Sorry.

The reality – sorry – is that Atlanta has had a playoff roster for probably three or four years now. Sure, there’s been something missing at a position or two, but that’s been overwhelmed, defeated by so much missing by those in charge.

I have an acronym that people in charge keep sucking, but I’d better not share it.

I almost never blame coaches for the failure of players, and am not doing that now. I will, though, lay last year’s second-half disaster at the feet of Raheem Morris and some of his staff.

For one, is the group that started bellyaching about something physically being wrong with Kirk Cousins after his second wretched game be that small? It was obvious.

Holy crap, the security people with their backs to the field saw that something was wrong, but those who saw him four or five days a week missed it?

Nobody goes from that good to that bad just because of a slump. That’s almost fraudulent mismanagement. Smells like a cover-up of something.

And early on, it was easy – my hand’s raised – to grumble about Cousins admitting a shoulder injury months later.

But here’s very, very old news: Athletes lie about their health alllllll the time. An eye could be hanging out of the socket, and we’ll get “No, no, problems. A little fuzzy at first, but it got better.”

Dude, you tried to high-five the first-down marker and then went into the injury tent to do No. 2. “Well, it got better.”

Coaches who can’t see such a physical issue? A coach who doesn’t just yank somebody when the performance clearly drops? Quarterback or not?

Not a good coach. Kind of like one who has two brand-new friggin’ quarterbacks – who have never, ever, ever taken a snap with that team, and one having never aken a pro snap – and doesn’t give them any preseason action.

Almost fraudulent.

Even with some defensive snafus, this was a playoff team, easily, with smart people in charge making intelligent changes.

Alas …

We should expect them to be smarter. We should expect to be less exasperated watching some press conferences. We should see some heat and anger.

And we should get a damn apology.

As for the over-everything’d draft, me, I’m always going with an offensive lineman first, then a defensive lineman or linebacker in the draft (ditto on signing days). Should actually be a hidden gem – and not labeled as such by the ESPN and “media” buttkissing hacks – on the list, sure, I’m flexible. Sometimes, you just see somebody who dazzles. Sometimes.

Speculation from outsiders is, as usual, pretty moot, and borderline ridiculous. A team’s list and plan at, say, the 15th pick, starts being adjusted about halfway there on the draft. That list, despite the mind-numbing “media” blather in the meantime, has been set for a few months, being adjusted ever so slightly based on trades and retirements.

And based on arrogant potential picks talking their way off of the list.

Atlanta has five picks. That’s fine. You don’t win with rookies. You build depth with rookies, or find trade bait.

There’s nothing to be read into moving up or not moving up. And every team’s top 10 list is different than every team’s top 10 list.

And don’t go nuts if Atlanta doesn’t pick a Georgia player, for there are very few consensus Georgia elite picks this year. But there are certainly Georgia picks who can – not will, because it’s a crapshoot – definitely make Atlanta better.

If – the most used word the last three months on the topic, along with “maybe” and “could” and “might” and “possibly” – they live up to some expectations.

Once the draft is over, the real suspense begins: Will Atlanta’s staff be smarter in 2025 than it was in 2024? That question is more relevant than how it did in the draft.

The spring game debate

It’s hysterical to hear clenched coaches suddenly think about having a spring game opponent, when they’re worried about injuries or any of those secrets – what a laugh – getting out.

Spring games aren’t what they used to be. Period. Haven’t been for awhile.

Let’s just turn it into a spring football celebration, and call it that, or some other silly name or some absurdity paid for by a booster.

Get kids on the field, and work in some football amid some fun. All the plays the clenched are too scared to run during the season? Run ‘em in the spring game.

Multiple hook and laterals (NOT LADDERS! NOT LADDERS! Common sense, folks). Double reverses.Double reverse passes. Come out in a T or wishbone formation (and run normal plays). Let a lineman throw a pass to another lineman.

Halftime, have a couple 5-minute interviews with former players.

And after the game, for whoever doesn’t need treatment, an autograph session for 45 minutes, kids first.

FOR FREE.

And included in the signees? The overpaid hermits known as the head friggin’ coach, who now signs fewer autographs and takes fewer pictures in a year than two predecessors ago did in two months.

Since they’re now too busy to make fan/booster tours at all despite having 2-3 times the support staff – it’s a farce, and slap to fans’ faces as their predecessor - make them spend a little time with the great unwashed, those who are responsible for the game’s greatness.

The obnoxious power-hungry money people – redundant, yes – are responsible for the ridiculous salaries, but it’s everybody else who makes it what it is. They deserve some live interaction,

Loving all these great fans while never interacting with them is offensive.Yessir, this is much longer rant for another day.

Loughdmouthings

If you’re surprised that that Braves will enter May a good weekend from .500, then, well, that’s too bad.

Folks would enjoy sports more if they didn’t enjoy self-torture, triggers, blather, and idiocy.

Note that the Dodgers lost 16-0 at home soon after the Atlanta series. That, yeah, that’s a surprise.

The Braves winning games? Not a surprise. A four-game winning streak? Not a surprise. Different players stepping up? Not a surprise.

You do not get a ring for April. Or September. Or November. Baseball has the longest season, so getting panties in a wad for the first two weeks of April?

Come on, man.

If they don’t win the division or World Series or whatever, it won’t be because of a slow start. They’ll spend time in first place this season. That erases the poor start.

The Mets will cool off. Pick up a game every two weeks, and by mid-June, divisional congenstion.

A grip is not a bad thing to have. …

Any attention paid – any attention at all, more than five cumulative minutes over three months just to peek in – to any story or bit or segment on a mock draft doesn’t say much for the brains of the person paying attention to as irrelevant a topic in sports as possible.

Can’t people grasp that teams – and colleges – do NOT pay any attention to media blathering or guessing or shots in the dark?

Can’t people grasp that mock drafts have all the substance of, well, hell, it’s hard to find the right analogy for having so little substance. Maybe as little as noon on ESPN and ESPN2?

Substance has become in itself fairly irrelevant anymore, so, yeah.

Literally and truly, any basement-dwelling keyboarder or other such goob – good hair or not – can do mock drafts and be as “accurate” as the “gurus” and they, too, can take part in a severely useless activity.

So, which of the dozens of crock drafts put out by any scammer – and it’s a scam, like bracketology – is accurate? Which one do you remember? Which one counts?

You can’t answer, BECAUSE NONE OF THEM ARE WORTHA CRAP. Ditto every single bracketology garbage. Man, the pictures folks must have.

And, man, having the same conversation daily for three months when nothing changes? Hard to take those folks seriously. No excuses about filling time or programming. If that’s all that’s brought to the conversation, mute is better.

“Then don’t read/watch/listen.” Well, one has to sift through the crap to get anything carrying a hint of IQness, and all this lowers the bar and standards of IQness.

Worthless is worthless, and some folks prefer worth.

Thankfully, the absurdity is nearing an end. …

Many of those blast golfer Patrick Reed – they emerged again as he rose the Masters leaderboard - are a whole lot more like him – and forgive the same and worse transgressions of others – than they’ll ever admit. …

I love Caitlin Clark and what she’s done for women’s sports, and she’s underrated as a complete player, but Paige Beuckers is a more complete player.

Problem is, they’re both such good people, it’ll be hard to muster up a WNBA rivalry. Neither is going to say something stupid or arrogant.

But their egos are strong enough to where we should see some epic battles. Throw in some Hailey Van Lith, and the WNBA keeps growing.

Yes, for the open-minded, this is a good thing. …

We must consume as much “Inside the NBA” with Ernie, Chuck, Kenny, and Shaq as possible. We really don’t know how much time we have left with them as things are.

And that’s a very, very sad thought.